Yesterday I heard the news that Dolly Parton had died. Then came the flood of tributes from people all over the world and from every walk of life.
Of course there were tributes. She was a legend.
But it wasn't really the music that stayed with me. It was the woman.
As I scrolled through story after story, I found myself thinking about life, legacy, and one question that stopped me in my tracks:
What will I be remembered for?
Death is one of the very few certainties we all share. One day, every single one of us will become… past tense.
That thought didn't make me sad. Surprisingly, it made me want to let go.
To let go of anger.
Of bitterness.
Of frustration.
Of resentment.
Of revenge.
Of indifference.
And perhaps most importantly, to let go of ever wishing someone anything other than well.
Now, before anyone thinks I am pretending to be some enlightened saint…. I'm not.
We are human. Those feelings are real. Sometimes people hurt us deeply, and in those moments our emotions are valid. I have had those moments too.
But carrying them? That's different.
They weigh us down far more than the person we are carrying them for.
What struck me about Dolly wasn't just what she achieved. It was the love people genuinely had for her. So many had never met her, yet they felt she had somehow touched their lives.
And I thought…
One day people will write about me in the past tense too.
I hope that when that day comes, my life will have made enough of a difference, however small, that someone smiles because I existed. That someone I never even met feels they knew me through kindness, generosity or simply the way I chose to live.
But before that day comes…
Let's live.
Let's be just a little bit selfish in the healthiest way possible.
Let's put ourselves first, because if I am not okay, it is much harder for me to be there for my children, my family, my closest friends, my team, or anyone else who depends on me.
I have to be okay first.
And being okay means choosing peace over poison.
The last few months, strangely enough, even prompted by Dolly's passing, have reminded me that although life can be unbelievably hard, there is still so much goodness around us if we allow ourselves to see it.
So here's my gentle reminder to myself, and maybe to you too:
Love yourself.
Accept yourself.
Celebrate yourself.
Forgive yourself.
Until we become past tense… let's really live.
Rest in peace, Dolly.
