UTO means pleasure.
It is all funny really. Since I started Naturally Tiwa Skincare, I have had thousands of conversations with women.
Women who look confident.
Women who are successful.
Women who seem to have everything together.
And yet, when the conversation becomes quieter, more intimate, the truth starts to emerge.
“So many of us just don’t enjoy intimacy anymore.”
For years I thought I was the odd one.
I thought maybe I was a prude.
Maybe everyone else had it figured out except me.
It turns out I wasn’t alone.
That’s one of the reasons I developed UTO.
People often hear me talking about it for women going through menopause, cancer treatment, vaginal dryness or vaginal atrophy. Those are important conversations, and they matter.
But I rarely talk about the other reason.
Pleasure.
Yes! Women deserve pleasure too and I think we are slowly but surely starting to realise this.
One thing to know is that because UTO is oil-based, it is not compatible with latex
condoms. That’s important. It’s best suited for couples who don’t use latex condoms.
And if you don’t have a partner, the UTO world is your oyster ��
But here’s what I love about an oil-based lubricant.
It is also a moisturiser.
Think about it.
How much money do we spend looking after our face?
The serums.
The moisturisers.
The masks.
The body creams.
Yet the part of our body we protect the most, the part we hardly ever talk about, the
part that is most associated with our womanhood, often gets the least care.
Why?
Your intimate skin deserves moisture too.
Not because something is wrong. Simply because it deserves care.
Then there are what I call my “ooh… ah…” moments.
Ladies… tell me I’m not the only one.
You are finally in bed. Your partner is in the mood.
You are trying to be present.
Then suddenly your mind wanders.
Did I switch the washing machine off?
My son’s school trousers still need that button sewing back on.
Did I reply to that email?
What’s that mark on the ceiling?
Then you remember…
“Oh goodness… I’m supposed to be here.”
So you return to the moment with an enthusiastic…
“Ooh…”
“Ah…”
Just to reassure your partner you are still engaged!
Thirty seconds later…
You’re mentally writing tomorrow’s shopping list.
Sound familiar?
We spend so much of our lives caring for everyone else that somewhere along the
way, we have forgotten how to simply be present for ourselves.
I am now in my fifties, and it has taken me this long to realise something.
Intimacy isn’t just about someone else.
It’s about knowing your own body.
Listening to what feels good.
Talking about it.
Laughing about it.
Not feeling embarrassed by it.
Whether you are with a loving partner or, like me, spending time with Richard…
Yes… Richard.
You deserve moments that belong entirely to you.
Because here is what I’ve learnt.
When a woman feels good in herself, physically, emotionally and intimately,she
shows up differently.
As a mother.
As a partner.
As a businesswoman.
As a friend.
As herself.
Looking after yourself isn’t selfish.
It is one of the greatest gifts you can give to everyone around you.
And maybe it is time we started talking about pleasure just as openly as we talk
about skincare.
After all… both are forms of self-care.
